Maybe you don't know, but Amazon.
Com offers sex machines.
More importantly, Amazon offers customer reviews for every sex machine, because while it may not always like it, it runs altruism on the Internet.
Every Nigerian prince, every subscription wall, every online convenience fee, and 10 people don't want money at all, they just want to help you find the best appliances to hump.
I was surprised to see that even in a large online store, everyone could see the real name, the products they bought and recommended, even the risk of outright humiliation does not exceed the human desire to lend a helping hand.
As a fake journalist, I feel the greater cultural significance hidden in all these sex machine reviews cracks, after reading the information provided by Amazon, I can say no now with complete confidence, no.
But I did find some strange trends among those who like to make things with engines, and I would at least like to share that with you.
4 if Amazon's comments indicate that the entire sex machine community is a swing in engineering, and if you only need two paper clips and an apple corer to get away from the hostage, this is the person you want.
Maybe the person who has sex with the machine will be the gear head, which seems intuitive, but it is beyond the casual enthusiasm.
It sounds like they can put together the car engine with their eyes blindfolded.
It's not just their mechanical knowledge that is impressive.
The creativity they show when repairing or renovating one of the machines to make it better to stimulate the genitals is very encouraging.
They often customize their rides and I'm curious why our country has been complaining about the shortage of female engineers.
None of them are off-site. the-
Masturbating on shelves.
They all spent a lot of time deceiving a machine that they would never show off.
But the most surprising thing about these reviews is that the caregiver put in a lot of sex toys before everyone uses them.
Their patience is enviable.
I don't want to speak for all the people who read this, but when you feel more frustrating than finding someone who is willing to do it, take an hour to lubricate the piston and tighten the bolts.
I have never planned anything in advance as these people have planned.
There should seem to be some sort of rule that masturbation aids never require you to put in more maintenance than the actual relationship.
There is a strange, sexy confrontation between tool purists and those who re-use them for sexual purposes. The tool in the picture above is called a reciprocating saw adapter.
It allows wood workers, carpenters and home improvement experts to connect different blades, Sanders, files and brushes to a reciprocating saw, essentially turning a tool into about six.
Now take a look at the relevant project section: Naturally, the infinite power of human imagination has ensured all the rumbling, sprinting, or spinning things in the world, and someone has figured out how to fix this.
Every serious comment about how great it is to remove the kitchen mud is buried under five comments about how hard someone c * m is
Poor tool purists do their best to ignore sexual toy reviews, just as they hope that if no one says anything, the Morphers may dissolve in the ether like fart.
The only hint that carpenters know that their favorite tool is sexually assaulted is that they highlight the home improvement project they are working on so as not to be mistaken for the kind of person who would wrap their genitals with a reciprocating saw.
This is so important to that person that you know he used this tool to wash the mud, he said it four times in a paragraph.
But the passion for sex toys is ignored.
They started to write some subtle pornographic comments, hoping to trick some simple handyman and have them agree that it would be helpful.
And then some comments have passed the ceiling-
Their tone is the installation of glass that cannot be distinguished.
Either they are comedy geniuses or they are suffering from the oblivion of sitcom.
They are surprisingly cautious about human relations, and for a group of people, they climb up the metaphorical skirt without any problem, exposing their deepest crotch secret to Internet strangers, they must be shy to reveal their relationship.
This is not a hobby group that likes to be bound (figuratively).
They steer clear of labels like "boyfriend" or "wife" and instead choose weird, presumably standing in the room watching their other half of the clumsy names of people who have been knocked by steel robots without meaning.
After reading so much of this, even a "partner" sounds very intimate.
I like to imagine that the person who wrote this review was suffering for half an hour because it would be more accurate for the "sexual partner.
For some sex machine lovers, it is unthinkable to take this relationship as the premise.
Instead, they just omit the term altogether, just as it is too much work to consider.
This happens a lot and it's hard to believe this is a mistake.
It all feels like a secret language that only they will speak and no one will ever admit it because, to be honest, no one outside the community spends 12 hours reading the sex machine reviews looking for patterns.
It seems more likely that they have been waiting for me to look for clues for me like some kind of lewd Moriarty.
This certainly explains why they all spell "attention" as "head" and there is no sign at all that they are aware of their sexual pun.
Some of them should probably go to a doctor, and I know we have different body structures and the sensitivity varies from person to person, but I'm really worried that some reviewers might be paralyzing themselves.
I'm sure they designed vibrating monsters with pneumatic tools and flew too close to the sun on their flight device.
By the way, the machine they are talking about is essentially sexy jackhammers.
What these people can't feel is not the itching of the garlic ---
It is a rubber-shaped night stick with 150 hits per minute.
I don't think this huge problem can be solved.
I think only hospitals know how to deal with people who die below the waist.
Also, Ladies, here's a tip that I'll leave to you: If you start a conversation with me in these words, "I'm a woman who can be beaten," I'm afraid of you right away.
You open a door and enter the horrible, haunted trauma home of your life, then immediately close the door and let me guess everything inside.
Call me ordinary, but I can never give you what you want, because you and I go a different way of sex.
This is absolutely fine, but I will do my best and will never stay in a room alone with you.