Samantha Bi's spoiler is not a White House press dinner.
As anyone looking at the front end expected, on Saturday at the White House reporter's restaurant in Samantha byn, she and her writing staff brought it.
Thanks to her speed.
The style of fire, the special show is full of good jokes, from jokes about CNN to jokes about past presidents, to jokes about future presidents, to gold habits about current presidents
Here are some of the best, delivered by Bee unless otherwise stated.
"You all want to make friends with our distinguished guests at the front desk.
They are the Committee to Protect Journalists.
If you leave the hall tonight and find your car locked by Sean Spicer, you will call these people.
[Display picture of car key: "Fake news! ” “Sean”. ] Aww, buddy.
Why did you sign with your own name? "Your work has never been as sad as it is now.
POTUS has convinced 88% fans that you are the enemy of the people.
When an elderly orangutan and his pet mobs yell at you, you can basically get paid to stand in a cage.
It's like a reverse zoo, but you have to stick to it.
We live in a golden age of journalism.
Unfortunately, this is due in part to a golden president who is eager to enjoy the golden shower.
"You can call it entertainment," CNN President Jeff zukell's clip . ".
You can call it reality TV.
But there is news almost every time.
Samantha bi: "Almost every time CNN gives you news, it's like your bad boyfriend gives you a climax.
Anyway, you end up lying in a damp place and he's snoring.
Zucker's snippet: I don't think regret is our character or mine.
Samantha bi: "said the man who put joeyon in the air.
"[For a while, Samantha bi imagined himself at the White House press dinner during the Ronald Reagan administration.
"The most terrible word the president says in English is: 'I am from the government and I am here to help. ’ That’s funny.
I thought they were: "You have AIDS, and the government doesn't care.
"America's great creator escaped again from the Vietnam War, he escaped from two Republican debates, and now he escaped from a dinner for journalists.
I think we know why he's wearing uncomfortable clothes.
Because he's been shitting, he fits well.
It just shows you that as long as a huge pussy has no president, he can be elected president.
Kumail Nanjiani: "Trump is like that weird high school friend of yours who shows up at the party but doesn't bring beer, drinks everyone's wine, it's weird for all the girls, no hate crimes will be condemned on the way out.
Carl Reina: "I'm the 11 th of inOcean, a movie about casino robbery.
Trump believes the film is not credible because it revolves around a casino that is actually profitable.
Billy ehina: "You will notice that Betsy DeVos and a bag of orphan bones have never been seen in the same room, which makes you think.
Bill O'Reilly: "It turns out that it's not good to have your flagship show hosted by a 400 pounds sex host --
200 allegations of harassment in the incidentpound bag.
Fox News: "The professional offenders finally got what they deserve, and how successful it is for women: $65 million and age --
Appropriate retirement
Rupert Murdoch: "Twenty years after setting up the table for Trump, the Tasmanian giant finally has what he has always wanted: BFF-slash-program-
The director of the White House, while enjoying a long journey, painted chewing gum on his damp cornflakes
Jump round distance.
"[During the Bill Clinton administration], Samantha Bees imagined themselves at the White House press dinner.
"Bill is called the first black president of the United States!
Don't rely too much on that label, Bill.
You might be in jail.
"[For a while, Samantha bi imagined herself attending a White House Correspondents Dinner during Mike Pence's future administration.
] "I think we should all thank President Pence for being brave in this role after Trump stuck his head in a honey jar. What a tragedy.
"Mike Pence, I don't think you're going to be a good president at all, but I'm coming over, so, at least in this case, conversion therapy works.
"After a disastrous year with Trump, we can finally stop demonizing immigrants and minorities and focus on the real enemy: gay children, which is fine.
For a while, Samantha Bee imagined herself winning Hillary Clinton at the White House press dinner.
A week after President Clinton's victory, we all heard a huge buzz.
I think it was the sound of the bullet we just dodged.
Or Bill O'Reilly's vibrator.
No, Reddit, President Clinton did not disappear because Bill O'Reilly told the truth about her presidency.
I can confirm that Bill O'Reilly lives well.
He left me a long voice. Last night's mail
It sounds like he's stirring cream when he's walking the stairs or something.
He's fine anyway.
He sounded relaxed at the end of the call.
"Hillary is under so much investigation and I'm starting to think that the FBI really supports female body inspectors.
"When Hillary spoke to Congress, I didn't want to say that Republicans were hostile, but she was the first president to have to walk to the podium with the key.
"Watch the whole instead of the White House press dinner on SBS on Demand: The article first appeared on the Vulture©2017 All Rights Reserved.
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