It's time to slide something a little. . . less awkward.
Valentine's Day is approaching, followed by the urgent need to plan something sexy and romantic.
For the second time in a row, it's no coincidence that part of the 50 Shades series is shown in theaters as new and old couples are trying to figure out exactly what their relationship is.
Fifty shadows is a continuation of Christian Gray, torturer who tortured the bedroom, and the dirty story of annassia Steele, the girl who is considered a super clever bookworm, but it seems difficult to realize that once you become addict on BDSM, it is always addict on BDSM.
For those who haven't read the book, you'll find the sequel as interesting as the original.
Like naked.
Great emphasis on nudity.
Here is a short clip to explain the plot of the film, as the film insists on having one, though it is born eager to be naked.
Christian won back Anna stancia after finishing the 50-degree gray blowout fight (technically, the movie starts with him trying to win her back, but her revolt
We 've put too much time into it) and they're starting to figure out how to get out of the dominance --
Obedient boyfriend-girlfriend.
Their relationship is natural (and, spoiler warning, though it's hard for us to be honest
Asked to find someone who has at least not read the Wikipedia page of the novel): Boy woos girl, had a hearty dinner and talked about the way he tried to change, the girl decided to give it a try, the boy tried to kill his God --
Have affinity for the ball
Now that everyone is caught, it's time to start talking about business: embarrassment.
All sorts of people will feel drawn to meet their natural curiosity about whether Dakota Johnson's ass is as good as it was in 2014, but viewers should be mindful of what occasion to honor the film.
Those who watch with their long-time boyfriend will have different experiences than those who go with their parents.
It's a joke, but you know what we mean.
So we have designed this awkward scale against fools so that you can weigh the pros and cons of each social activity.
The HR manager tried to plan a first quarter staff party and don't say we didn't warn you.
If you go with your girlfriend. .
This is definitely the best environment to see 50 colors darker
It is best with a few bottle of wine.
You can fuck, you can yell, you can whistle the whole time Jamie Donnan does saddle horse training.
Really, after savf Blanco drinks your weight, the movie could be nominated for Bella La Lan ODA or for the best picture of your choice.
You can recall all the time you guys helped each other by breaking up, and at the opening, Anna read some old notes from Christian as a remix of cool play scientist in the background.
No one said it was easy. . .
It's a pity we broke up ).
When Anna says something like "I'm too dressed", you can hold your ears against each other.
"The most important thing is that you can stay honest in the nipple statistics for 2017.
(We counted 10 appearances, but we didn't have a group of girlfriends to monitor our check scores.
) If you go with your brother. .
As the old saying goes, everything is even more embarrassing for a group of brothers.
Or something like that. But seriously—
There was a bunch of men sitting in the cinema together, which was a bit like that. . .
Especially if the film is darker.
How do the rest of the customers know that they're not just there to take a poor, sweet picture of Dakota Johnson's spirit, the 10 nipple flashes mentioned earlier call it stereotype, but maybe you can mess up your business. See Moonlight! SeeLa La Land!
Anything but fifty colors.
That said, if you and your brother manage to watch the movie without undoing your skin, you will be more mature and sensitive.
In addition, you will learn a variety of new vocabulary, such as "weird f--kery. " Bravo.
If it's your first date. .
But we actually don't think it's as embarrassing as it sounds to see the movie on our first date.
First of all, this part is much lighter in erotic than the first part.
Before any nudity, the screen time was up to 21 minutes, and before the Red Room and sex toys appeared, the screen time was 58 minutes and 61 minutes respectively.
This makes sex for a good, healthy normal person for an hour.
(Note that normal is relative.
) Take a stranger to BDSM-
The flick is the touchstone of a great personality.
Sitting in a room full of people with keys
Jamie Donnan inserts something on Dakota Johnson that can only be described as the anal beads in front of you, a great sense of humor.
When Dakota draws a lipstick map on Jamie's chest, you have to be able to laugh in order to specify the "don't touch me here" roadmap.
If your date is sitting quietly on the big screen and saying "I don't know if it's worship or beating you", you should run far and never talk to them again.
If you are with your serious long-term partner. . .
Watching this movie with your romantic partner can cause a lot of problems.
Does he think my ass should be like that? Wait, do I think his ass should be like that? If my boyfriend doesn't have a pommel horse in the gym at home, that's why he doesn't look like Jamie Donan at all and you can start to wonder why your sex life isn't at all like Anna and Christian.
Why do you always finish your dinner, not in exchange for X-
Rated activities.
Why have you never offered to take off your underwear in the middle of the crowded health ministry
Restaurant checked
Why have you never introduced a gynecological examination?
Just like the sex products in your daily life
You could have saved a trip to the doctor's office all the time, just in-home stirrups!
You may begin to wonder why you never buy luxury gifts for each other.
Why have you never bought him a $25,000 Aspen hotel stay, why have he never bought you a promotion, maybe you should stop, because you two are obviously inferior couples in all aspects.
If you have already had a third date, but before the third date. . .
Run from the theater, don't go.
There is nothing good about watching this movie together.
We ask you to come back next time, preferably with a group of your girlfriends or someone you just met.
If your date suggests this trip, maybe you won't talk to them anymore.
If you suggest this trip, you may be able to re-evaluate your entire outlook on life.
Think about it: a no-quite-serious-but-definitely-more-than-
All these causes and effects cannot survive.
Close-up nipple shooting and gynecological examination.
With the ass!
Elevator soft core porn!
Also, the schedule for Christian and Ana to get back together and then move in to get engaged is not healthy for the average person.
Even if he does have aRiddickposter in his childhood bedroom, Christina will inevitably become more natural and romantic as you have seen in four yearsto-six weeks.
Of course, he is also very scary, but no one will remember inappropriate domineering text messages about a trip to New York to work;
They will remember the handcuffs.