In the 1971 classic cult of Harold and Mord, Ruth Gordon plays a quirky 79-year-
A frustrated old man in his 20 s or so, played by Bud Corte, who taught him to cherish life.
He fell in love with her in the process.
Betty Dowson, 72, and Eric Wilkinson, 25, are not Harrow and Moder, but their age differences can lead to comparisons.
When they became a project three years ago, friends teased them about the movie ---
It appeared a few years before Wilkinson was born.
"I didn't hear about it until I had a relationship with Betty," Wilkinson explained . ".
"But there is no comparison.
Harrow and Mord are just friends. We're lovers.
We spent the whole day together in bed.
"Oh, of course, we have Harold-and-
Betty recalled.
"So, I'm a lot older.
But when a man has a girlfriend or gets married to a much younger woman, no one opens his eyes.
But on the other hand, it's a big deal.
We are the double standard of sex here.
When our friends and family accepted our relationship, the teasing stopped very quickly.
In our social circle, everything is comfortable now.
Dowdosen and Wilkinson live in an apartment in the East Side of Manhattan.
They also worked together: Dodson made several sex education videos and sex toys.
Wilkinson handles the business side, tracks their sales, and works with the webmaster to keep the Dodson website up to date.
Their relationship is not the same as most people, but some of the lessons they have learned together will interest any couple.
When Dodson first announced that she had spent a weekend having sex with a man she kindly called "young puppy", "compared to the fact that Wilkinson is a male, her friends are not very skeptical about their age differences.
Dodson has not had sex with men for 10 years.
Dodson is not your regular old man. She has a Ph. D.
In terms of sexuality, it has been one of the leading sex educators in the United States for more than 30 years, and is also the author of the little classic "sex of one person.
"She is also the country's most outspoken advocate of masturbation and a critic of what she calls" co-dependent partner sex.
"That's why her friends are so surprised at her tryst.
For the first time in years, the godmother of masturbation has done masturbation with a man.
Next fall, the author of "the sex of one person" released "The climax of two people" and she said she "wouldn't write" without Eric ".
I 've never written a sexual book about something I haven't done at the moment.
"There are some matches in heaven.
Dowdosen and Wilkinson did it in bed.
"When we first got together, we didn't have a lot of work projects, so in a year and a half, we had enough time to do a lot and a lot of things," explains Wilkinson.
Then I'm busier at work. -
"The climax of two people" is a big deal. it takes time and effort to run Betty's business.
Like any couple, more work means less sex time.
But we still have sex a lot and still enjoy each other.
Other factors have led to their recent sexual apathy, "Hey, I feel like I 've been here for years," Dodson said . ".
I still love having sex, but I can't have it all the time as I used.
Sex frequency is not a problem.
This is the quality of sex. After three years, it's great.
Sometimes we will be fast.
Sometimes we share the climax in bed all morning.
Sometimes we don't have sex for the time being.
It depends on what happened.
We will, of course, masturbate.
I walked into the living room the other day and Eric was beaten by some porn.
I put the vibrator at my fingertips.
Dodson is not a natural goddess of sex.
She was from Kansas, in her 1940 s, a commercial artist who drew fashion ads for Wichita department store.
In 1950, she moved to art school in New York, where she continued to work as a commercial artist and painted on weekends.
She married an advertising executive in 1959, but did not reach a climax with him.
They divorced in 1965 but are still friends.
After the divorce, Dodson discovered the climax of a sexual, bisexual and non-one-wife relationship with Grant Taylor, who is currently her webmaster.
She soon began to create the art of pornography and held several exhibitions, which allowed her to enter the cultural underground of New York, something she had never thought she would experience or enjoy ---
Collective Love Party
"I must have had sex with thousands of men and women," she recalls . ".
"It was a wild time.
But in hindsight, I am also exploratory in preparing for my work as a sex educator.
"In 1973, Dodson made a splash for the first time as a sex educator at the national women's organization's first conference dedicated to sexual issues.
In front of more than 1,000 then 43-year-old women, Dodson, the audience presented a slide titled "creating beauty for female genitals.
"People don't know what will happen.
She clicked on the first slide, a close-upup of the well-
The vulva of one of the 15 friends was modified, she was naked, her legs stretched, and her genitals were open to her.
The audience took a sigh of relief.
Dodson declared: "Our lives have been led to believe that our cun people are dirty, ugly, smelly and shameful.
But I'm here to show the world how beautiful they are.
The audience was shocked.
Some people booed when Dodson used the word "unt.
"But she continues to stick to it and promote what she thinks is a pleasure for the female genitals.
With the slide show, the noise gradually subsided.
At the end of Dodson's performance, the audience stood up and applauded.
The report proves that Dodson is a sex educator who cannot be ignored.
The next day, she used a workshop called "electric vibrator for masturbation" to let more people turn their heads.
"These appearances are 25-year-
She hosts weekend workshops around the world, conveying her confident message
Love thousands of women.
Her motto: how we make love determines what we bring to our partner.
Dodson's sex life is also very special.
After a collective love party at the age of 60 and 70, she spent 80 years of bisexuals, but mostly gay.
After 90 s, she briefly returned to heterosexual status, but finally decided to go solo.
"One reason I chose to masturbate is that I found out that most of my male peers-
I was in my 60 s. -
Not so interesting.
They have emotional baggage and health problems.
They don't like--
Not usually--extended sex.
They want to dominate the relationship and always want things to go their way. " Enter Eric.
Wilkinson grew up in Virginia. His father was a businessman and his mother was a housewife.
At the age of 14, he became interested in sex. He read self-
He helped read books and masturbated in several teenage magazines he had passed.
"I have been considered a Protestant since I was a child, and masturbation is an expression of a sinful desire.
I struggled for this for a few years but by the age of 17 I was tired of guilt.
I decided: If I was burned because I was defeated, that's it.
He lost his virginity when he was 18.
In college, Wilkinson wanted to research.
"But they don't have the classes I want to take.
I want better sexual skills.
I want to teach you how to eat pussy, how to do anal sex without hurting a woman.
Then Wilkinson read Dodson's one-on-one sex.
"I have read dozens of sex books.
I 've reached the point where I don't think I can learn more from the book.
Betty's book is the best one I have ever read.
It has so much information.
He wrote it for her publisher.
When Wilkinson's letter arrived in 1999, Dodson received emails from a lot of people who had read her book or had seen her video.
She usually sends a form. letter replies.
"Eric's letter is different.
He asked the question of a young man I have never heard. He was well-
The knowledge of sex, more reflection than most people, and curiosity about sex in the way I have always been.
He is a strange combination of an enthusiastic student and a very self. assured man.
I'm interested.
I remember thinking: This child is another thing. " They e-
Mailed for months.
"We are so cool," Dodson said with a smile . "
"We have seen each other in cyberspace.
She likes his email. mails.
Eric, a talented English writer, connects his sexual experience with the young women he meets. His e-
The email became Dodson's favorite porn: "I'll be opened and have sex with a handsome young man masturbating fantasies.
Wilkinson asked him if he could check it out.
Dodson refused.
She did not fall into complications, especially with the heterosexual complications of a man who was young enough to become her grandson.
But Wilkinson insisted.
In the end, she gave in, but insisted on keeping a distance from him.
The deal is that he will stay with a friend who will only have lunch.
Wilkinson has other ideas.
He wants to have sex: "Female lovers of my age have no sexual experience.
They were suppressed and not very creative.
What I want is a sex tutor who looks like a perfect woman.
When Wilkinson walked into her apartment, Dodson's determination to keep the distance quickly disappeared.
"This child is so desirable, a gorgeous 6-foot hunk.
He wants me to be his sex teacher.
Very flattering.
We went out for lunch and went back to my apartment for four hours of hot sex.
Eric went to his friend and took his suitcase and spent the weekend with me.
We had all kinds of sex he never had: I did deep-throat on him.
I played with his ball and when he played with his Peter I slipped a fake penis to his ass.
It's not only interesting, but it's the first time. rate sex.
"Aside from his sexual curiosity and enthusiasm, Wilkinson told Dodson that he had always wanted to use a vibrator when making love, which made him like it.
"If a woman takes out the vibrator while having sex, many men feel threatened," Dodson said . ".
"They thought she was saying," you're not good enough.
But Eric welcomes the vibrator.
His cock is in my pussy and I have my wand on my clit.
It's been a long time since I had my penis.
Male vaginal orgasm.
Dodson also likes the sexual maturity of Wilkinson.
"Eric is more advanced in sex than many of my contemporaries.
He is a student who focuses on sex.
He was fantastic in bed: sweet, sexy, fun, experimental and his ejaculation control was excellent.
Wilkinson wanted to know what it would be like to have sex with a woman a lot older than herself: "I was very pleasantly surprised when we first got naked.
Betty doesn't look like the 69-year-old I imagined. year-
Old women should look like.
She took good care of her.
She's definitely not an old lady.
She looks like she's in the middle. 50s.
"In Dodson's view, her weekend with Wilkinson was a pleasant weekend.
She's on a long-term
Relationship, not to mention letting him move into her apartment, a private sanctuary shared with hundreds of workshop women for decades.
They kept in touch after Wilkinson returned to Virginia. "We e-
"Mail and talk by phone," Dodson recalls . ".
He urged me to do it again.
He wants to stay for a week.
I told him to stay on weekends.
He came over and stayed for a week.
"Their Sex is great, but even loyal sexuals like Dodd and Wilkinson spend more time in bed than in bed.
Dodson was also surprised how comfortable it was to have him around.
"We are very harmonious except for sex," she explained . ".
"We have similar personal habits.
We are not an early morning.
We're all night owls.
We are all hard-working people, but we like to have a lot of time to rest.
I grew up with three brothers, so Eric resonated with my familiar family by my side.
I am not only his lover, but also his big sister, mother, grandma and aunt.
We are all fun in these characters.
"A few months later, Wilkinson graduated from college and wanted to spend more time with Dodson.
She agreed to let him stay for a month: "Okay, I said.
I need an editor to review my memoir [still unpublished].
I gave him the job.
Good results.
"At the end of the month, Wilkinson asked to be an apprentice to Dodson to continue her sex education work.
"It's very flattering," she recalls . "
"Of course, since 1970, I have not lived with men. No one bad-
Heterosexual relationship in mouth-
I call it a pair of Bunda"-
More than I did.
But Eric is very cute, helpful and smart.
When he saw how contradictory I was about his request to stay, he suggested that we could stay in the moment and take things for a day at a time.
He swore that he would leave as long as I wanted him to leave.
This reassured Dodson.
The same is true of the fact that Wilkinson takes his position as her business assistant seriously.
"I am not a boy who lives on relief.
I have my own.
Respect for productive work and salary.
A few months have passed.
Wilkinson told his parents about his relationship: "They were shocked.
At first, my mother was worried that Betty was using me.
She is from the south and believes that our relationship is proof of evil in New York City.
My dad didn't say much. come home.
Let go of this fantasyGet a life.
For a while, Betty's friend thought I was taking advantage of her and thought I was lying to her.
When they see how helpful I am and how happy we are all, it stops.
"Age is just a number," Dodson insisted . "
"I feel more comfortable and harmonious with Eric than most men my age.
He is more energetic, more interesting, more energetic and looks absolutely beautiful.
People ask me: what do you see in this child, he has no big job, no big salary. I don't care.
I don't need a man to pay my rent or take care of me.
I want a young man who is interested in what I am interested in and who wants to learn.
Our society forgets that the mentor/student friendship of ancient Greek philosophers is an era-
Glorious tradition
Eric is my toy from today's world, so I'm using him.
Or I'm his mom, so he's using me.
Guess we're all using each other and enjoying every minute.
Dodson explained: "I have never met Eric's father, but once his mother realized that I was most interested in her son, we became good friends.
She was with us when she came.
We talked on the phone.
One of the many things I like about her is that for a rather traditional Southern girl, she is quietly improving in terms of sex.
She never had a problem with Eric masturbation when she was a child, which is a big problem for many parents.
Dodson has always regarded the relationship as a transitional arrangement before finding his own apartment.
A year after Wilkinson moved in, several close friends sat her down.
"They said, 'Why have you always said that Eric is a temporary input to you.
You have never been so happy. ' It was true.
There is no reason to kick him out of my life. So he stayed.
Dodson suddenly realized: "I realized that Eric is the reward for my 30-year service. he is a sex education worker who teaches female orgasm and masturbation.
He found me because of my job.
Finally, I accepted his delightful presence.
Her publisher approached her and asked her to write another book, and she agreed to write "the climax of two people".
"In the new book, I re-examine straight from the perspective of a smart woman, tribal elders, and honey, and so far I have gained grandmother-like wisdom at wazoo.
"The climax of two people" is not just a love letter to Wilkinson.
This book touted masturbation as the key to enjoying partner sex.
Dodson said: "Couples must liberate themselves and accept themselves.
Please each other and show each other how they do it.
If a man can't stand to see his lover using a vibrator, my advice to this woman is: keep the vibrator and recycle the man.
Dodson said: "The book also advocates women as male guides in straight sex:" For the sake of a good sexual partner, women must know what they want and be able to show their loved ones. ".
"Women have to teach men about female sex rather than design our sexual desire patterns based on the needs of men.
This is contrary to what usually happens. -
Young men who know little or nothing about sex will eventually take the lead and blame themselves when young women cannot reach orgasm.
So after years of saying that women need to be the leader of a sexual partner, this beautiful and sexy young man entered my life and said that he wanted to learn everything I could teach him.
Is this great, or is the "two highs" also involved a struggle of power that marks the long term
Term relationship.
"I never know why I end up hating every man I fall in love.
Dodson said: "In my marriage and most of the other previous relationships, there has been a struggle over who made the rules ---
Women usually end at the short end of the stick.
Power struggle kills the fun of sex.
This time, Eric and I are talking about our power issues.
Now he is very good at sex. he is usually the number one [leader] in bed, and I am the boss of the industry.
But since it took me a lot of time to feel powerless in most of my relationships, I was very aware not to abuse my power.
"Both Dodd and Wilkinson agree that the most difficult part of their relationship involves the question of who controls it, in part because she is his boss in terms of business.
"It's hard to be a good lover in bed and an effective CEO," Dodson said . ".
But I can't be a loser either.
Sometimes a task has to be done in some way and I have to make sure Eric understands why he has.
"We are all committed to avoiding conflicts at work," said Wilkinson.
It would be nice for Betty to tell me how to correct it if I made a mistake and I know she still loves me.
If I am too picky about her, I always let her know that I love her.
We give each other a lot of love, which helps us.
"People enter marriage with the idea that they will share power equally," Dodson said . ".
But this rarely happens.
I never met.
The question for couples is: how to balance their power in conflict resolution.
"We are very angry with each other.
It is natural for two capricious people.
But we try not to turn anger into anger.
There is no war between us.
We don't take revenge.
There is no pain in silence.
Let's say it.
We will not let the pain deteriorate.
We are good at solving our conflicts without hurting each other's feelings.
"Their job now is to stay.
"I don't treat this relationship as much as I do with marriage and other heterosexual relationships," Dodson said . ".
"It is not until death separates us that we have the expectation of living happily together.
There's no pressure to believe that fantasy. it's a lie anyway.
As long as we feel good about both of us, we are committed to staying together.
Things stay relaxed and happy.
"They give each other space.
"We have been together for too long and we need to be separated for a while.
We have some individual friends who often socialize without other friends.
We also have our own bed in different bedrooms.
But the first person to sleep was blocked by another person, and we hugged for about 15 minutes every night.
"The last element of Dodson --
The relationship between the balance of power is monogamy system.
Since her divorce in 1965, Dodson has been working hard and is very happy to treat non-one-wife.
When Wilkinson entered her life, she thought she was above and beyond jealousy. She was wrong.
"One of my girlfriends was attracted to Eric, so with his permission I gave him to her for her birthday.
Later, she wanted to see him more, which made me angry. I got angry --
Then feel embarrassed about it.
I have to re-learn what I learned in 60 years-
We can choose between one husband and one wife and enjoy the vast world of sex.
Because I already have a wonderful sex life, it seems unfair for Eric to ask for a one-husband wife.
Especially because part of our relationship is based on mentors. student thing.
He wants to fuck me-education work.
But I was not feeling well at the beginning.
I was worried that he would find some lovely young things and run away.
Finally, I looked in the mirror for a long time and said, Dodson, come together.
I know that holding Eric back will ruin our relationship.
I made a decision to overcome jealousy.
"We don't all like one-husband and one-wife," said Wilkinson . ".
"In our view, the one-husband system has deceived every member of a couple by narrowing the world down to two people.
Saying that you will only limit your things to one person, you are deceiving yourself.
But a rational belief in something does not mean emotional acceptance.
So we spent a lot of time discussing how to make a non-one-wife relationship work.
"They came up with a simple rule: no one took someone else home and no one stayed overnight without checking in with someone else first to make sure it felt good.
Since agreeing to the rule, they have several groups of three and four, and Eric has had sex with several women he knows through friends.
"It's good for me," said Dodson . ".
So far she has gone out with a few of her old friends and only has sex with another man.
At present, neither of them has any other fixed lover.
Dodd and Wilkinson both believe that their non-one-wife System is an advantage of their age difference: "I don't think I can have this relationship with a woman my age.
They are concerned about marriage and children.
They were threatened by a non-one-wife system.
An older woman, a woman with Betty's experience, needs to give up sexual possession.
Dodson said: "I used to have a lover. I almost got married. now I am 80 years old. His wife is 40.
She liked him very much at first, but it is different now.
She is eager to have her own life, including having sex with other men.
But she husband insists on monogamy system
In a relationship that is much older than another, I think it is unfair for older people to have young sex.
If age brings wisdom, the elderly should be smart enough to allow young people to experience sex in all their fullness.
By sticking to the one-husband system, my old friend is no different from an overoccupied parent.
The children are against this. -and rightly so.
I predict his young wife will bail him.
Dowdosen and Wilkinson also praised their non-one-wife system for keeping them loyal to each other.
"We never take each other for granted," explains Wilkinson . ".
"We decided to stay together every day.
Another thing that makes them happy is feelings.
"We always hug, kiss, not just before we go to bed, but all day," said Dodson.
In most couples who will soon give up halfway.
But we don't.
Sexual physical contact or not helps us stay in touch. " Some people --usually women --
Say a good relationship brings good sex. Others --usually men --
Contrary to good sex, good relationships can be established.
Dodd and Wilkinson both stood firmly in the latter camp: "When I reached a climax with Eric," she explained, "I felt the surge of this love deepened me
Of course, I can enjoy the orgasm on my own, but Eric is very focused on my happiness and being with him will increase the intensity of my orgasm.
At my age, I think feelings should be interesting or why many women think love is profound and meaningful ---
Continue forever
My adult relationship is based on sex. sex is a game.
Keep in mind that play and happiness are very suspicious in our civilization society.
Wilkinson agrees: "Many people think that good sex is a magical thing and it somehow falls on your lap when you're with the right person.
I never believed it.
Good sex is like any other skill: it requires knowledge and practice.
I was frustrated with the couple of my age.
"Let's try this, or talk about it," I said . "
They are not as experimental as I think they are, and that causes conflict.
Not only does Betty want to try like me, but after that, we all tell each other what we like, what we don't like, and what we can do better next time.
She's a great person.
Her sex life was great and now she passed on her wisdom to me.